Saturday, October 28, 2006

I would like to say that I fell asleep listening to the rain against the windows. That wasn't the case last night. I couldn't hear anything over my tears. My mom called me yesterday. The doctor has put her on complete bedrest and her kidneys are starting to fail. She goes back to the doctors on Monday and if she gets worse than they'll admit her to the hospital.

In the back of my mind I know that she must be doing okay. If she wasn't then she would already be in the hospital.

But the other part of me knows she getting worse and she just needs a new heart and everything will be all better. What if she does start to decline and eventually doesn't make it out.

I'm a full days plane ride away so when do I go see her...I don't know. I can't leave my job, but I would in a heartbeat if something happened. I can't afford it, but my friend would loan me money.

I hope she can hang on for two more months and then I can see her. I already have my ticket booked for that.

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