Thursday, March 04, 2010

Picked up hoodies from Matt last night outside his work. Driving there and any time I have seen him in the past three weeks I get an instant urge to vomit. He comes walking out and my heart just races, he is so freakin' cute, I can't stand it.

He sat in my car and we talked some more about life. We laughed and joked around...things between us seemed better. Not as tense, not as emotional. I mentioned to him that a new vegan cafe opened in Davis Square and he said maybe someday he will take me there and buy me dinner. That would be nice.

There is something about this boy that I can't explain and it's not something I've had with anybody else. Even as a teenager in high school I didn't date, I never saw the point. Nobody held my interest long enough. My first boyfriend was at the age of 19 and even then, that was a shit show. I've been on countless dates with countless guys and even joked with my friends about writing a book about them. They accounted for a lot of laughs. This one is different and because this one is different I can't let him go that easy. I'm sure some people think I should just move on and forgot about this and hanging on is pathetic, and I probably would too if I wasn't in the situation. Until you are, it's so hard to know what to do.

This hasn't been easy but I feel I have a pretty level head on my shoulders when it comes to most things and at this point I think I'm doing the right thing. Time will only tell.

I'm ready for the weekend, it's supposed to be sunny and possibly hitting 50 degrees. And my morning would not be complete without stopping at this place first. Not for the donuts, but for the coffee. Boston has converted me, I don't think I could live without it now.

picture source

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