Sunday, January 23, 2011

I feel like we are finally starting to find our grove.  

This step-mom gig is hard, as I've talked about before.  I have a really hard time conveying what I want to say because I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings and come off as a bitch.  I know there is a parent/child connection that I have not yet experience and will never experience with him.  He is not mine.  As much as that sounds selfish, it just will never be there.  I don't think that is something you can duplicate and since I haven't had my own child, I'm not exactly sure what it feels like. That doesn't mean I don't love him unconditionally as if he wasn't my own though.  I would do anything for him.  I go into mama-bear mode when we are at a playground and somebody is mean to him.  These past few weeks have been really great though.  I miss him during the times that we don't have him.  I feel like we are both finally starting to get one another and he is realizing that I'm not going anywhere.  It's a good feeling. 

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